‘Helpful’ Mom Advice…

No mother is a stranger to those lovely backhanded, “helpful” comments. We hear them in grocery stores, from relatives, friends, doctors offices, and just about any public place. They can be a real punch to the gut or just plain infuriating, but in reality, also hilarious. Sometimes you just have to laugh it off, right?!

The Pregnancy Comments

Ah, yes. The true classics. My personal favorite response to pretty much any rude pregnancy comment is “I KNOW, isn’t it GREAT?!” It fits most scenarios and throws the commenter off just a little bit. Perfect!

“Wow, you’re HUGE!” Oh really? I hadn’t noticed one bit!

“Really, you’re not due yet?! You look like you’re about to EXPLODE!” Ah, yes. Thank you. Just what I needed to hear.

The Grocery Store Tantrum Comments

“Looks like somebody could use a nap!” Not sure if you mean this exhausted mom or my clearly cranky child, but either way, YES, WE DO.

“I remember those days!” Not the worst thing you could say, lady, but also not really helping me out at the moment!

The “Too Many Kids” Comments

“Don’t you own a TV?!” Don’t even get me started on this one! But suffice it to say, there are lots of responses you could give to make the commenter feel extremely awkward for even bringing it up!

“Don’t you ever want to have an actual career or something?” If you’re a stay at home mom, I’m sure you’ve heard this one said or implied plenty of times!

The Parenting Advice Comments

“You really need to put that baby down!” Guess what, no matter how much I held or wore my babies, they managed to learn to walk and gain independence. Thanks for the input though.

“Sleep when the baby sleeps!” What does this one even MEAN?! Has anyone actually successfully slept every single time the baby slept? Did you never need to change your clothes or shower or eat some food? And how does that work if your baby just doesn’t sleep?! So many questions.

“That baby needs a hat!” I can’t tell you how many times I’ve gotten this one. In Florida. In 80-90 degree weather. I promise, my baby, who has a higher body temperature than I do, is not freezing to death.

Realistically we could probably go on forever because somehow people keep coming up with new and worse things to say to new moms, busy moms, tired moms, frustrated moms, and all the moms in between.

What are some of the craziest things you’ve heard since becoming a mom? And what the heck do you say in response?!